Our Adoption Story

May 24, 2010

*Note from Mindy:  So many readers have asked me questions about our own adoption experience that I decided to publish here the entries from my personal blog as they happened.  I share this because the Heart to Heart agency we used has 18 babies being born in June and July of 2010… and they do not have enough homestudy-ready adoptive families for them.   

What I share here is quite personal, I know, and this is really putting myself out there for scrutiny… because these are my thoughts and emotions (un-edited) as they happened. I hope that this information will allow you to experience ‘second-hand’ what adoption was like for us, and perhaps if you are going through it yourself, you can relate and possibly see how we coped with all the ups and downs. Through these posts, you literally will walk with us as we begin the process from Day 1 all the way through finalization with our son, and beyond…

I know that some of these posts are religious in nature, as I am a very religious person, and I truly believe that my son came to our family by divine design. I apologize in advance if the emotions I talk about are not familiar to you or do not fit your religious beliefs. I will try to my best to insert explanations where I feel appropriate, but hopefully you will be patient with me and my views on God, religion, and family.

Again, I know that by doing this I and my family open ourselves up to judgements and ask that you read these entries in the spirit in which they were intended. Please understand that, until now, these experiences have only been shared with close family and friends and were originally intended to be personal journal entries. As such, they are very personal, sacred, and heart-felt moments of mine and I hope you will treat them with the same respect even if you don’t agree.

Lastly, in an effort to make my 37 single-spaced pages of journal entries into something more reader friendly, I have broken my writings into nine separate posts, linked one to another, instead of one massive post. This way you can read a little one day and come back to it another, etc. Thanks for understanding!

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THE BEGINNING

Jan 4, 2008

You know, everyone has times in their lives that are simply more difficult than others. I suppose it is the normal cycle of life. For the first eight years of our marriage, I would say that my husband and I had it pretty easy. Not that everything was always perfect, but for the most part we were able to “make lemonade” with anything that did go wrong in an otherwise extremely blessed life. For the last two years, however, I would say life has become much harder. Not to say that life was at its worst, or that there aren’t bigger problems we could face, but these two years have been long and difficult in many respects for our family.

To begin with, our move back to Utah from Missouri was definitely an adjustment. We really miss everything about Missouri. It simply felt like home. It felt so good to experience life outside of the Utah ‘bubble’, to experience the charm of the Midwest, and get to know and love so many new people. Utah, for us, really has a very unique atmosphere (good in most ways), but it can take some getting used to.

For purposes of background, my husband and I have been trying to have another baby for nearly two years without success. The short version is this: I had an IUD (Mirena) put in after our #4 daughter was born and had it removed shortly after moving here. After nearly six months of no baby and a very irregular menstrual cycle, I called my OB for an appointment. All the doctors swore up and down that the IUD has extremely minimal side effects or long term problems when it became more mainstream in use (and when I had it put in). Since then, however, the statistics became more concrete and I happened to fall into the 0.02% who experiences complications with it. This ‘no-baby’ period may seem short to many of you, but for us that is a really long time. We seemed to get pregnant at will with our previous four girls. After going through a variety of tests (progesterone therapy, hysterysalpingograms, ovulation tests, etc), the doctor seemed to find nothing abnormal and simply wanted to put me on Clomid. (This would seem like a very risky move given that our first two girls were identical twins, and our #4 daughter started out as a twin.) Out of concern that we could end up with quadruplets, I declined and called my uncle.

You see, my uncle is one of the most prestigious fertility specialists west of the Mississippi. And, yes, this new uncle/niece interaction was a little strange at first! At least in my head, but in reality I was OK with it. My uncle is uber professional and very kind to be helping us try to sort this out. If anyone needs a good fertility doctor, I would most definitely recommend him.

My uncle had me come in to complete more specific tests (often at varying times of my cycle, so this process took months). During one of the ultrasounds on my ovaries, he found scarring on my uterus which was causing my body to retain blood (thus the weird cycles) and very likely the cause of infertility. YES!! Finally a real problem that seemed would require a quick fix, but… that was too easy. We have now had two invasive procedures to correct the problem, neither of which has worked, and talked to several doctors who are all wondering where to go next. Because it isn’t a common problem, there isn’t a common fix either. In escalation, my uncle had many more amazing services he could provide to more reasonably guarantee us a baby and a gender of our choice. Those procedures, however, would be quite expensive even after he waived is own time. As it was, this discovery was already becoming costly.

We have obviously run the whole spectrum of emotions. I have been angry, bitter, hurt, sad, emotional, happy, and excited… sometimes all at once. Watching the calendar every day, like a hawk, desperately holding on to any hope… just to come crashing down when the cycle started all over. Living in a neighborhood where there are 16 wonderful women that have had babies in the last six months doesn’t help either. I don’t begrudge them their babies at all, they are wonderful women, but I want one too. I’ve tried to be strong by being kind, smile, and be happy for all of them, as I should. That, however does not stop the pain.

Many of you may be asking, “She has four beautiful daughters, why does she need more?” The answer is simply, because we don’t feel done. When you know, you know. It does not matter if you have zero children or 12. With our #4 daughter starting as twins, I think we simply got used to the idea of five children so when we lost that other twin… there is an empty hole in our family. Somehow, it doesn’t feel finished. Call it a gut feeling, mother’s intuition, or the whisperings of the Spirit … we just aren’t done. I wish I knew better how to say it.

Plus I grew up in a family of five kids.  I know how much fun having lots of siblings can be.  I want that for my children. (Yeah, that’s me when I was little. I’m in the front row on the right–the chubby one! LOL)

I finally am now at a point where I have some peace with it all. I still want a baby. My arms and heart ‘ache’ for a baby. But I am also ok with it, I guess. I have made my peace with Heavenly Father and put it in His hands and on His timeline.

I know in my head that the tide will eventually change again, and things will look better. For now I’m just trying to keep my head above water and do the best I can. I’m not saying life hasn’t had good moments or been fun along the way, but that overall these past two years have been harder than normal.

Sometimes you just have to play the hand that life deals you, ya know???

Friday April 18th, 2008

Today I am finally going to blog about adoption. Although my hubby and I have now been working on the adoption stuff for three months, it will be the first time that I am writing about it publically. My husband and I had mutually decided to keep it under wraps for a few months just to see how it would go and gauge how we would feel about it all. Let me start from the beginning…..

When I was about 12 years old, I watched a 20/20 documentary on Romanian orphanages. I was so touched by this segment and the poor babies that lived in those orphanages. I remember that there were two 8-year old boys who were best friends. One year, a family came and adopted boy #1, but the other family that had come to bring home boy #2 couldn’t get their paperwork completed and had to leave him there for another year. The two boys were just sobbing at the airport as boy #1 left for America, separated for the first time ever. Then the documentary showed the family returning the next year and bringing home boy #2. What was amazing was the difference between the two boys after only one year in America. It was so striking. Boy #1 was so healthy and vibrant looking in his cute American clothes as he greeted his best friend at the airport. But boy #2 was still gaunt and hollow looking. His hair was dull and thin. It was simply crazy what real food, a good home, and the other blessings of living in a good home could do for that boy in one year! Not to mention what having the gospel would have done for any child.

When I was a teenager, my parents and I spent some time one summer helping in an orphanage in Nicaragua. Again, I was so touched by these poor babies and how sad they were in their condition. They were starving for any affection.  I grew so attached to one little girl in particular, I knew I had it in my heart to love a child not biologically mine. After that I always think my heart was open to adoption and the blessings that it can provide to everyone involved.

Before my hubby and I were married, we had a discussion one fall evening under a tree on BYU campus. We mutually discussed our complete openness to adoption. It surprised me somewhat that we were both on the same page. It was something neither of us had ever spoken of, yet neither of us were were afraid of it either.  But, a few months after we were married we became pregnant with the twins and got busy with them and life in general. We did not discuss adoption much for several years.

After daughter #3 was born, I again felt like we should investigate adoption. But I wasn’t really ready to commit to the idea since we could have our own. We heard about a program in Missouri called Baby Boarding through Agency A and decided it was the perfect option for us at the time. We would temporarily house a baby after the birthmom delivered it, but before the adoptive parents could take over custody. In Missouri, by law there has to be at least a three-day time limit where the baby must be cared for by a 3rd party. This gives the birthmom the opportunity to think about her decision and carefully weigh her thoughts before signing over her legal rights. Sometimes if there were paperwork problems, like refusal of the birth father signing, the baby could be in our house for much, much longer.

We complete all the paperwork, medical forms, home study, etc… necessary to be certified through the state and Agency A. It was the same procedure as preparing for an adoption; however, we would not be keeping any babies long term. We received calls several times about potential babies, but only received one baby in the year we had left there. Little baby Ashton (nicknamed ‘Marvin J’ by us) came from Agency C and stayed with us for two weeks. We sure loved on him, as well as all our friends there, and enjoyed having a boy around the house for awhile. Basically it was a way for us to give a good home to a baby in transition without actually dealing with the stress of adopting. It was like “dipping our toes in the water, without actually taking the plunge” is what I often say. Through this experience we also saw how working with an agency can be, and how we felt about loving a child that wasn’t biologically ours.

Needless to say, we were sad when we moved to UT and figured out that the state does not need Baby Boarding families. I could have bean a baby boarder forever and been happy just because I love babies in the newborn stage! For awhile it didn’t seem as though we would ever adopt since we could so easily have our own, but it quickly became apparent that this was not the case.

Of course, we have done anything and everything in our power to correct the secondary infertility. I had my husband give me a blessing at one point that specifically stated there was another baby for our family. And we both feel that to be accurate… but we weren’t getting a baby here. About four months ago, I started thinking about the whole adoption process again. At first, it was just passing thoughts here and there, but after a while it started to weigh on my mind more and more. I began to talk to my husband about it again.

We decided that if we were going to ask Heavenly Father to bless us with another baby we needed to also allow that the baby may need to come via another means. We both decided that we would open up all the channels possible and see how and if Heavenly Father would do the rest. So a few months ago we started the loads of paperwork once again to get certified as adoptive parents.

Currently, we have completed all the initial paperwork, which entails medical forms, financials, four reference letters, an ecclesiastical leader endorsement, fingerprinting, FBI background checks, etc. We have had our initial interview with Agency A, and filled out its paperwork online. (This entails another 2 weeks worth of questionnaires to match babies with our family and pretty much life histories for each member of our extended families and immediate family.)

My husband and I still have individual interviews with the agency, a home study review (where they look for things like fire extinguishers, baby locks etc…), and to complete our online profile (what the birthmoms see) before we will be completely done. We are about three weeks out.

We have already had some neat experiences in getting thus far. Before the adoption stuff started, I was having a lot of anxiety over my whole infertility issue. I was stressing every month, feeling bummed, etc, however since the day we handed in our initial packet for adoption, I have felt nothing but calm and peaceful. I hadn’t mentioned that to my husband, but one day he simply turned to me and said he had been feeling unbelievably calm. I totally agreed and we both recognized that we had been feeling the same way without knowing it. That was the turning point.

I recognize now that this could be a long waiting process. We have no idea at what point we will be chosen. We also understand the reality that even if we are chosen… we could potentially not bring the baby home. There are a lot of unknowns throughout this process. Even knowing all of that, and going into the process optimistically guarded, I really feel as though the right baby will find our family through biological means or via adoption. Maybe this whole thing is a “Zion’s Camp” type of experience for me, one where you have to show you have the faith to go through the process. That it is more about the journey than the destination. I have to build the kind of faith where I am completely and totally dependant on the Lord and work within His timeline. I must understand that I literally have no control over any of this baby stuff anymore. I have done everything in my power to provide opportunities for the Lord to bless our family in that way, whether biological or adoptive, and now have to simply hand it over to Him and hope for the best. We just need to work both options… and hope that one comes through for us.

Agency A has mentioned several times that often the best resource to getting a baby is by telling your family and friends. Then if they know of anyone, who knows anyone who is a young birth mother, they can help you get in contact. So we are now letting our family and friends know that we are looking for another sweet, tender baby to add to our family.

To read more, click Our Adoption Story: Part 2

144 thoughts on “Our Adoption Story

  1. Awww, so cute I did the same thing adopt. I adopted 9 kids 4 girls and 5 boys from all over the world. : ) Thanks for sharing your story. <3 to you
    God Bless you and your family

  2. i wanted to share my story with you, I feel like you know what I was feeling the whole time.

    when I had my first kid I was thrilled about it. I had it when I was 19. so being a single mom was rough and for the last 8 years was… just me and my sweetpie: Sophie…
    Then I met the most amazing guy in the world we got married 3 years ago. i got pregnant right away and I was thrilled.. i just knew: I love being a mom so much and having a life inside of me is so amazing but, The doctors said because of the complications of the pregnancy it was going to be hard for me to have another baby.. Lizzie was going to be the last baby I could carry on my womb.
    But Lizzie was not ok, she had breathing issues I start praying more often… my Lizzie couldn´t make it though the breathing issues she had got worse and I lost her a month after she was with us. My faith was almost gone… why did God gave me the joy of having her just a minute?
    I lost it… but… I have to live because Sophie was also there, she needed me too. Sophie was shocked and she didn´t understand why god did that… but, then again. God knows it best… so maybe this is the answer,

    Your story made me realize the other options we have because i want another baby.. is not gonna be lizzie of course, but, we: my husband and I want it so much….like you said: YOU JUST KNOW. I am a mommy, and I love being a mommy.

    I know Lizzie is going to be ok in the hands of god, taking care of us… and then new baby that comes to us.

    thank you!

  3. Dear Mindy check out once upon a time.
    The evil quen has graet hairdoes. FYI I found the lae fishtail in there.

    Your faithful and loyal fan
    Linda

  4. It irks me that you complained about your frustration over not being able to have another child. At least you already had 4 beautiful children. Try not being able to conceive at all.

    • that´s rough. She complain because like she said: “you just know”.
      She complain because she didn´t know what else to do but then: she also did something about it: she adopt two beautiful kids. Right?

      C´mon have some faith. :) she has this awesome family and she want to welcome two more members to her comunity. what´s wrong with that?

  5. Hi

    I love all of your videos
    And I want to tell I’m inspired by you
    Cause’ I saw you’re first vid and I saw the first one
    And I’m like oh my gosh!!!!! She started doing hairstyles
    In her bathroom and now she doing them in her own STUDIO lol… Thanks for insperation :)

  6. We adopted my little sister from Korea when she was 3 months old. My parents got divorced shortly after and I raised her as my own. She, my son, and one other I raised have truly been the joy of my life. I was 9 when we picked her up at the airport. I had asked my Grandfather, who was Native American, how it worked? Was she really one of us? He answered, “She was born one of us, it just took her a little longer to find her way home.” When they handed her to me off the plane, I knew she was mine and how right my Grandpa was, even only being 9 yrs old. My sister is 34 yrs old, and I am thankful everyday, that she was ours to raise and love. Good luck to you and your family.

  7. Nice story! God Bless You!
    I just want to say that i really love waching your videos and brooklyn and bailey too! Your kids are really cute. I just want to meet you guys in real life. To bad I only live in Nashville, Tennessee. And you guys are in Texas. Well its a Dream Come True!

  8. Hi mindy,
    Firstly, id just like to say… I LOVE UR HAIRSTYLES!!!
    Anyway, my mum found this one day and showed me it a few times. I bookmarked it because i loved it that much. I havent been on it since it changed because if i remember correctly, it was pink, before, wasnt it? Personally, i dont believe in God 100% but find myself lookin in his direction when im down, angry, happy. I tend to thank him for really good or fun things that have happened and asking him for help when anything bad has happened. So…. im mot sure! I have always said to my mum, ‘im never having kids, im adopting’ but realized over the years that i doubt it will happen (women in my family have pretty good health and all have children… not sure if that means anything though….). Your story is inspiring, and although i only had time for one section today, i just know it is going to be AMAZING. I believe you now have 6 children, each of which are GORGEOUS. i always say after watching your videos, ‘i wish i looked like them.’ I do. Always. Back to the point, i truly in love with the fact that you feel empty without number #4s twin. That sounds REALLY MEAN. Let me explain. I mean it in a way….. this is hard! Ok. Sometimes, i feel like because i dont see one of my sisters much (because she is at university about 200 miles away,)i feel like im missing an arm or a leg. Well, not literally, but i think you know what i mean. Also, im not saying i love the fact you dont have a biological #5 child. Im sayin i love the fact she/he will always be there and she/he is not being replaced by adoption, but simply trying to fill a gap a tiny smidge more. I dont want to sound mean or like im saying the twin is being replaced but i sorta find it hard to explain. I hope you know what i mean.
    I love you SOOO much and even though ive yet to read the other blogs, you and your family are truly inspirational people.

    Love, yours sincerely, from, (however you want me to say it!)
    Olivia xxx
    ~P.S. believe it or not im 12. Xxx love you guys!!

  9. I am so glad you decided to adopt a child. That reason is that I was adopted from Hangzhou China when I was 3 and I had cleft lip and pallet.Throughout my whole life, which has not been long considering I am only 14. I have always wonder who my real biological parents were, but I also knew my adoptive family is my real family. That is because they are the ones who chose me and who love me. I also plan to adopt when I am older because I want to love a child just like my parents love me.

  10. This story was such a inspirational one and one that touched my heart. I never knew that you adopted a child since you cant give birth to another one (which was very sad). Also, I never knew that your forth girl had a twin (it must have been very hard since you guys lost her). I have always wanted to ask though have you ever considered adopting a child that wasn’t a baby a teen maybe or a child that was a different religion (I know this might be personal but it would mean alot to me if you answer). I am a 13 year old teen girl almost 14 and I am so inspired by your family. I do hairstyles and have learned so much from you and I have been watching you when you just started ( back then you took videos in the bathroom and I didnt know brooklyn and bailey’s names also sweet pea wasnt born yet. Yet I am such a big fan of you guys and I love identical twin and always wished I was one. I am apart of a big family like you and I feel what you mean by an empty hole before my baby sister was born I felt the same way. Our family has 7 kids 3boys 4girls. I really love big families and you learn to enjoy them ! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING YOUR STORY IT MEANT ALOT FOR ME ! I love your family and god bless it :) !

  11. Mindy, you are so inspiring. My professor frequently visits Africa to help out at an orphanage, and she has become so attatched to the children. My own best friend was adopted, and I know how much she means to all of her family. And God does deliver, fully and completely, though not always in the ways that you expect.
    I wish the best to you and your family.

  12. WOW this story is amazing, you have such a good heart, and so much faith, God bless you and your family. I’m 12, and im so touched, thank you for inspiring me it means so much. PS BIG fan of your videos, you are such a great hairstylists, ever since I’ve seen them i always beg my sister who is 11 to let me do her hair. And my younger sister has the best curly hair to make. Thanks:)

  13. My name is mrs jennifer am from united kingdom i married for 25 years but no child to call my own my mother in-law was calling me all kinds of name i prayed for God to give me a child i did every thing i could do visit many doctors to no what is wrong with my body system but the doctor said nothing is wrong with me then i said to my self what is wrong,a friend of my said to me that i should adopt a child at the first time i never want to do that but things was not easy with me i cook and eat alone no child to eat with me i was living in the dark,so one day i make up my mind and i said to my self i want to adopt a child i discuss it with my husband and he refuse that at the first place after few months my husband called me and he said he needs a child and he is nothing getting any younger,that was how we visit CHRIST ADOPTION CENTER to adopt a child we love her and her name is KELLY,he is a very lovely kid and brilliant too,you can contact this agency at CHRISTADOPTIONCENTER@GMAIL.COM

  14. Mindy,
    First of all, I LOVE your channel!! I would be lost to death without it when fixing my 8 yr old daughters hair for school; I am hairstyle stupid!! LOL… Secondly,
    I noticed in your adoption story you mentioned having the Mirena and then complications with conceiving…. was the scar tissue that was discovered due to having had the Mirena in place??? Just wondering because I have had the Mirena (twice actually) and have been experiencing the irregularity you described and was just wondering if suggesting the ultrasound of my ovaries would be something I might recommend to my gynecologist…. Thanks!

  15. Mindy,
    I know you have like a million people commenting, and you might not even read this, but I just wanted you to know that I believe you are among the few brave women I have ever known of. My sister had 4 kids then adopted two “brown babies” as she says, and I really am so grateful that she did. I was able to experience first hand how Heavenly Father can step in and help a child and his/her family find eachother in this great big world. I consider adoption to be a miracle, and one of the most sacred acts performed EVER! I really think you are so brave to put yourself and your most personal thoughts out for the world to read. You tell a loving story of how amazing and positive adoption is, and its one this world needs to hear more of. Bravo!

  16. i wish i could have a family like tours sometimes. i wish i was part of tour family or i can be adopted by you. your family alwyls looks happy . i in 12 years old plesse put a vidio of how to be a family like yours

  17. Wonderful story, your children are very blessed. I too have adopted – I had three natural children but felt the calling to help more children. After being a Guardian Ad Litem (voice of the child in the foster system) we decided to become foster to adopt parents. We helped well over 30 children in the first two years and adopted two infants (now 10 and 7). For those who have a desire to adopt but cannot afford the expensive adoption fees, there are thousands of children waiting for their forever homes, with no cost to the adoptive family. There are so many older children 6 and up, that will end up in the system and never have a place to call home just because no one has found their forever child. Many age-out without anyone to call Mom or Dad. We have a dream that will hopefully come true one day, God willing, and will try to help more children caught up in the system and young moms-to-be, to help them learn how to care for their babies, rather than having them removed from them.

    Love your cute girls hairstyles videos and enjoy trying them out on my girls, one of whom (10 yr old) will wear one of the styles when she sings the National Anthem at a minor league baseball game :-) God bless.

  18. Thank you for your connection to Zion’s Camp and for being willing to allow such vulnerability so others can find strength through your experiences and faith.

  19. I “stumbled” on over after watching one of your no heat hair videos. I an SO thankful I did! My dh is ready to be done and I’m not. I also have 4 kids (as you did). Someone recently just told me how great Mirena works for her. I’ve never been super comfortable with iuds or bc pills. I’m glad to have read your experience…I know you said it’s .02% chance, but still I’m thankful to know that chance is out there. Thanks for sharing.

  20. I was so touched by your story Mindy! I am only 11, but because of you i have realized how many kids are in orphanages and that i want to adopt one day. My mom is pregnant now, 8 months actually, and your hairstyles help a lot. She doesn’t have a lot of time in the morning, and with 3 kids, 1 on the way, she gets tired a lot. It helps her that i can do my own hair in the morning. I know you are Mormon and i am Catholic, but i do believe that the Holy Spirit led you through this process, and God wanted you to have your adopted kids. You and your family are so inspiring. Thank You Mindy and family!

  21. Dear Mindy,
    Your story is so inspirational. I am a Christian too. I have adopted cousins and I really love them. Your family is gorgeous! God bless!

  22. Can you make a other hair style like something you can go to school with and can you tell bailey to do it plz love camila

  23. Mindy you are such a beautiful person! Thank you so much for sharing such a profound, wonderful story with the world and with me <3

  24. Hello Mindy,
    First off I truly love you hairstyles and have been watching since the beginning and my daughter and I love when you have new dos… I actually have a serious question, which we can chat about via e-mail.
    How did you handle the loss of your daughter or the twin? I ask because my husband and I recently lost our 13mo old son this Feb and it would great just to speak to someone else who has go through the same thing.
    FYI- I do believe in a Great God, and with out Him I know we would not have gotten through this difficult time without Him.

    Sincerely,
    Kay

  25. This is such a beautiful story! Thank you so much for sharing it with us it was truly inspiring! My heart goes out to you Mindy!

  26. I am a Hindu but I believe in only one religion, the religion of love that binds us together. God bless u all. U r absolutely fabulous.

  27. Omg I love watching your hair tutorials and getting to know that person behind the camera seems more interesting that was a good thing you did ! Enjoy

  28. Thank you, Mindy, for sharing your story. I know you probably don’t read each and every comment. But I’d like you to know that I am fully in support of adoption. I think it is such a wonderful way to show God’s love towards the rest of His creation. Also, I think it’s wonderful that you are not afraid to show your religion. I think (not to pass judgment) that it is cowardly of those who hide their faith. Jesus tells us that if we hide our faith, He will deny us when we get to Heaven. Thank you for everything! I actually suspected this before I read your story and I am thankful you said it.
    Blessings in the Lord,
    Alyssa

  29. OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG your new baby boy is soooooooooooooooooooooooo cute!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so why do you want to do hair Ideas for us?!?

  30. I’m probably the only person who read all this but isn’t a mom, and this was toufpching and could relate a bit to the part about the orphans because in my home country, there are many orphanages there and it’s so sad seeing them

  31. Mindy, thank you for sharing this story. I needed to read your words! Long story short, my husband and I have been trying for a baby for a year. We suffered a miscarriage last year and the hurt was unreal. But I am pregnant again (4 months along). I keep stressing and worrying that this baby won’t make it either, but then reading these thoughts of yours hit home exactly and gave me the strength and courage I need. You said, “Maybe this whole thing is a “Zion’s Camp” type of experience for me, one where you have to show you have the faith to go through the process. That it is more about the journey than the destination. I have to build the kind of faith where I am completely and totally dependant on the Lord and work within His timeline. I must understand that I literally have no control over any of this baby stuff anymore. I have done everything in my power to provide opportunities for the Lord to bless our family in that way…” In this TTC journey, no words have been more powerful for me than yours. Thank you, thank you, thank you. The Divine sent me to your blog and I am so grateful. I have done everything I can, this baby and this pregnancy is in God’s hands. I just need to accept and relax. These are such comforting thoughts. I have really been agonizing. Thanks again! God bless you and your family.

  32. Dear Mindy
    Thank you for sharing your experience it was very touching and I am happy the you now have what you have been searching so long for and I’m sure that everyone not just me is happy that your happy
    Please follow me on viber or kik my name is badgirl56789

  33. Hi Mindy,
    I’m 14 years old and I’m a big fan of cutegirlshairstyles I do your hair styles all the time for school your girls are so pretty and your boy is very handsome your story inspired me to adopted a baby when I grow up :) and my family is also very religious I love God we go to church every Sunday and that’s when I wear your fancy hair styles :) thank you Miny for making cutegirlshairstyles :) I wish I can meet u one day I hope I can go to Imats when I’m 18 and meet u :) thank you so much

    Love,
    Remi

  34. hi mindy PLEASE DONT take this the wrong way what do u mean by lost twin? does it mean the twin passed away please dont mind and im only 11 and a big fan thank u soo much for sharing this touching story

      • Hey mindy I am sorry that you lost CGH#4’s twin sister. I am a twin and my sister is 13 and I am 15 but she has brown hair and I have blonde

      • Hi Mindy,
        My name is Bianca i am now 23 but when i was 17 i lost my beautiful twin babies they were both going to be girls, i was going to name them Kahlilah and Emmalynn,It was very upsetting to lose both my babies before i had finished high school! It was 6 years ago and i have now got 2 4 year old twin daughters who i ended up calling Kahli and Emmily, i also have a 2 year old daughter Anastasia and also a 1 year old daughter Rosi. Funny how i have daughter all the same years apart as yours nearly, I really wanted to adopt a baby last year before i fell pregnant with baby Rosi, My husband just left me 1 month ago so i am now a single mother of four i just wanted to tell you that you are like a younger second mother to me and that you are definitely my idol and will always be my inspiration Xxx~Bianca~Xxx

  35. I’m so happy that everything worked out and so happy that you guys have God through all of that! I’m so glad to have you guys and your channel! I don’t even know you but in a way I feel like I do! Im around Brooklyn and bailey’s age so I love them and their new channel! Love you guys and please keep posting!!

  36. My mother has a friend who had two children and then got her tubes tied but the Lord had destined her to have another child so she became pregnant again. That goes to show that if the lord wants you to have another child, whether through adoption or biologically, he will make sure that you get one somehow. :-)

  37. You have a nice wonderful family! The Twins are so cute love there YouTube channel BrooklynAndBailey so cool! Love the story! Love the hairstyles We hope that you guys have a nice beautiful day!

    God Bless You Guys * ~ * ♥♥♥♥♥

  38. Your story was so touching! I have always wanted to adopt! I hope as an adult God will help me find the perfect child/children if it is the rith thing!

  39. Hi Ms. Mindy!
    I’m only 13 years old but I just wanted to say how awesome it was to read this because I found out we have a couple things in common besides hairstyles. First, my family also loves Christ and I felt very comforted to know that you also believe that too. My parents also adopted a girl from China about 7 years ago. Having an adopted sister has been such an amazing experience for me and has made me want to also adopt in the future. And are you guys Christians or Catholics?? My family is Christian…. I was just wondering. :)
    Rachel

    • I am Christian as well. Are you Catholic or Christian? My guess is, by the way you speak, I think you are a Christian. Am I right?

      • I have been enjoying all the hairstyles and just did sock curls for 7th and 9th graders. I was scrolling down all the responses and just happened to land on yours. I thought it was interesting if you asked if Christian or Catholic. Catholics are Christians! They are not Hindu, Muslim or Jewish. They believe in The Holy trinity of God the Father, his son- our savior, Jesus Christ, and the Holy spirit!

  40. Dear Mindy, I almost read your whole thing! For what I heard I think you are a great mom! I am 9 years old. Your adorably kids are really beautiful! GOD BLESS YOU!!:)

    • Dear Mindy, I almost read your whole thing! For what I heard I think you are a great mom! I am 9 years old. Your adorably kids are really beautiful! GOD BLESS YOU!!:)

  41. WOW! I had an IUD too right after my 1st child. It caused me a lot of pain. I finally had it removed when I realized it could cause infertility (which my doctor never told me about -.- I have always wondered what life would have been like if I had never agreed to that IUD. I had no problem getting pregnant before the IUD with the child I miscarried and my oldest child but after the IUD when we tried to conceive again, it was a nightmare. The doctor’s told me it was because I had PCOS but I have always wondered about that IUD. I had all but given up on the idea of having more children for 7 long years. It was with the help of my doctor, mother, and grandmother giving me medicine and by God’s grace that I was able to conceive my middle child and we had my baby right afterwards to ensure that we would have more than 2 children.

  42. I know the feeling of feeling like others are thinking things like “you already have a child, so you have nothing to be upset about.” We have only been able to have one child, and after a many procedures and medications and even surgery in the last 3 years, we have accept this, but it is still hard. I too realize I am very very blessed to have my one son, but that doesn’t mean I still don’t have a righteous desire to raise more children in our home. We have lots of love to give, not to mention a 5 year old brother who is very lonely. For now, we have decided we are content. Costs of more procedures or adoption are too much for our little budget right now. Sorry this is getting long winded. I don’t know what the future hold for us. I do know that we are all blessed with a loving Heavenly Father who will guide us in our choices. Thank you for sharing your story.

  43. Hi mindy! You are such I great person and I understand what you are going Through.My grandparents lived in Missouri and Utah also.does van shaar seem familiar,probably not! Are you LDS?
    -krishel
    Ps. I look up to you and your family!
    Pss. Thanks for helping me with my hair in the morning!!!!

  44. Mindy, tu historia me parece maravillosa, tambien en nuestra familia vivimos un proceso parecido, cuando estabamos en el proceso de adopcion Dios permitio que quedara embarazada, llego a nuestra vida un maravilloso bebe que ha esta fecha tiene 8 años, pero aun esta en mi corazón el anhelo de adoptar un niño mas, creo que mi corazón aún tiene capacidad para amar a un niño que necesite amor……
    gracias por compartir tu historia familiar bendiciones.

  45. Thank you so much for sharing your life story with us , especially since it’s so personal. You and youre family are a real inspiration and you are really blessed with the family you have.
    I may be young, not married and no children but your story really emotioned me a lot. Things are still difficult I could say here in Romania ( yes i`m from Romania as i see you mentioned it in youre story) I see a lot on tv how pepole strugle to adopt these days because of all the paperwork , not many have the luck.
    I wish you all the best to you and your family.

    xoxoxo

  46. Mindy,

    Do you know how bad it hurts to not be able to have children? I have always wanted a little girl from China. But the cost is much more then I can afford. I have prayed for years for God to give me a baby and he still refuses to allow me to have one.

  47. Mindy.. i changed my favorite tv show. So i could finish reading your story and i couldn’t stop crying.. i think i felt all the emotions you put when you were writing this blog. U see i am 24 years old and married for 6 years. We have try so many things to get a baby and had no luck.. i have pray like crazy, my faith is been in its ups and downs… infertility is something i do not wish to anybody.. is the most devastating and emotional feeling that i do not wish not even to my worst enemy… i have never give up and never will, i still hopping god will bless us one day.. and your story just touch me soooo much, i been feeling so bad lately.. i guess is one of those times when u think of a baby so much that it makes u a little frustrated and depressed.. i want to thank you for your kind words.. after reading this i fell that i don’t want to give up, i want to keep believing that something grateful will happened in our lives… thank you again and may God bless your beautiful family!!!!

  48. I have been following your videos for some time now. I use some of them on my own hair even though I’m 31 years old. What I liked about them was that I have very straight hair, just like your first 4 daughters. When I was little my mother could do nothing with my hair because it is very thin and straight and any updo fell down.

    But I remember one particular time I watched your video and thought about people with different kind of hair. I wondered if those would work on Afro-textured hair.

    At first I thought it was a very random thought. That was before learning anything about your family.

    Thanks for sharing your adoption story. Please also write about your youngest daughter’s adoption too. But what I’m really looking forward is to see a video of doing the youngest one’s hair. And maybe a cool boy hairstyle too.

  49. Hey Mindy. My name is Emma. And I am 11 years old.. First things first. I would like your email because your story seriously made me cry.. I have a sister from China and We adopted her in 2004. We had 20 dollars in the bank after paying for the trip. It is a lot of waiting.. And congratulations for the beautiful family you and your husband created. Your Kids are lovely! I have tried almost all your videos. But fail at 99.9% of them! I am now trying to master the knotted bridge braid thing.. I think that is what it is called. But I keep having to tell my mom how to do it cause i am not the best at doing things by my self on my head. I also keep telling her “I really wish Mindy was our neighbor! You are so beautiful and every time i come to school with a hairstyle you taught me i would always get compliments and say “Thanks Mindy!” in my head! But seriously you have changed the way people think of me.. (sadly its my hair and not my heart that changes the way people think about me, but you know!! Thanks!!) And with this story above you really changed my heart! and i want to thank you for that!

    -Emma

  50. Dear Mindy,
    I am 18 years old, and I love watching your hair videos! It’s funny, when I started watching your videos, I could just tell you were a Christian. You have such a beautiful story and I think God will bless you for being so open with your readers. It’s obvious that you love Him and are seeking His will.
    God Bless
    Elizabeth

  51. I think you’re so lucky :) , I’m not married and don’t have a biological child , and have never tried for that but I have always thought about adopting a child , but in my country only parents who can not have children after 5 years can adopt and that has so many tough procedures that people forget about that or prefer to go abroad and adopt a child.I work in a charity organization myself and I see so many children out there waiting for a family , I hope it happens to me sometime too :)
    xoxoxo from Iran.

  52. Thats awesome i love ur hair styles and my family is lds to i dont know if u r but i know byu i want to go there im 13 i have to brother im the middle child i love ur hairstylea.

  53. Thank you so much for sharing your adoption story. I was adopted as a baby and my parents 6 yrs later adopted a 9mo old w/ fetal alcohol syndrome. I think its amazing to give others a second chance at life! I enjoy your videos! Thank you for everything that you do! Have a great Day!!

  54. I can’t believe you adopted so many kids! It must be tiring, but very fun. I’m 9 and saw alot of your videos they are so inspiring especially your story!

  55. This was so cute . I’m 13 and i love yuu , yuur girls , and the hairstyles , although i can’t do them on my hair cause i have short layers in it but my little sister loves them . Keep postingg !

  56. hello. i read your story. it is beautiful and i love of you are strong and have faith in Heavenly Father. I also love your hair styles that i do on myself and my sisters. they are just soooo aborable.keep on posting videos and showing the world that you are a ROCKING HAIRSTYLIST!! <3

  57. hiya, i read ure story. it was so detailed and heartfelt. i am only 13 and a half years old but have felt that your story has definately persuaded me to adopt when im older. ive always known that i wanted a big family but it never crossed me that i should adopt. oh and i love all ure videos ive nearly watched all off them and mastered some on my younger sister.xxxxxxxx;)your biggest FAN!

  58. lost twin? why where it comes the picture of you and your daughters it says lost twin?
    WHY?

    WHY?

    I WANT TO KNOW PLEASE ANSWER

    Oh and you look adorable when you were little

  59. I read your adoption story start so finish and i cried the whole time. i am 13 years old and love your videos i try the styles on myself and on my little cousins all the time. My favoriteis the waterfall french braid. your story is truly inspiring and your family is amazing and beautiful. mindy you are such a role model to me god bless you.

  60. Hi

    I love all your videos for hairstyle I’m 24 yrs old and I use some of the videos you doo u make them seem so simple thanks for taking the time to do them.

    Your adoption storie is soo inspiring. I was adopted from Thailand when I was 2 yrs old and it took my parents 5 yrs to adopt. I’m blessed every day that I got a second chance at a better life and I thank my parents for that. I know when I’m ready to have kids I’ll adopt because I want to give that child the kind of life my parents gave me. Thanks for sharing your story with us.

    L.

  61. I know how hard it is in Romania. I’m half Romanian and this summer when I went to visit for the first time, I was shocked. My parents always told me to be grateful for what I had and I was, but I never imagined it would be like that with beggars and so many orphans.

  62. I give you so much credit for everything you have went through. You were so brave and never gave up and that is just amazing how you did so. Thank you for sharing your story. And by the way you have a beautiful family. (:

  63. Your adoption story was an answer to prayer. Thank you so much. I was so overwhelmed, I didn’t know if it was the spirit or Satan discouraging me. I can’t even begin to tell you what a blessing it was to read your story. Everything you described I’m going through. It helped to see your beautiful girls and see how blessed you have been with adoption. We have two amazing boys and I feel so selfish sometimes wanting anymore children. We are working with “Agency A” right now on our home study we started the process two years ago and it feels like it will never be completed. (We had a few sudden moves that helped delay things.) I just can’t thank you enough. Thank you for your testimony and your willingness to share your joy and pain.

  64. i have watched all ur videos in youtube without knowing that u have a website. Today when i visited ur website the first thing i saw was the adoptation n i couldnt believe my eyes. I have never heard of a story like urs. Im a teenage girl (sri lankan) n the only thing i can say is I’m a big fan of urs..u r a great example of a great mother (hats off). Honestly in my country, parents cannot take care of their own children n they send them to temples where the children get free education bt believe me its worse than being in a orphanage. If those children had gotten a mother like u they would have had a great life. We are not allowed keep orphans illegally or legally :) because it is sri lanka n some of the people sell their children to foreigners just to get money n enjoy their lives. I know, I am still a teenager so i cannot adopt bt i will try to help them in any way bi can…thanx for sharing ur experience with us n i love u all so much.
    blessings..!!

  65. Hi, my name is Claire and I am fourteen years old. I really like your videos reguarding hair and i came across many that I could and could’nt do! But your channel has helped me out tremendously and some of these hair styles are my favorites!!! I also read part of your story about your adoption and losing a baby and that must of been tough for you and your family! I am a christian/catholic and I know you are a mormon but part of your story has really touched me and I know you have gone through a lot. I really would not know how bad it is to lose a baby at this age. I also like how you said you wern’t done with raising kids and that really made me think how powerful you are! please respond to me because even though you haven’t met me you are a great rolemodel to me! God bless you

  66. I love your blog and all your stories! I am a girl of 4 kids and my older sister and younger brother are both adopted from the phillippeans! I wasn’t born when we adopted my sister but when we got my brother I was 8 and it was an unforgettable moment because he was 7 and I learned so much from him! I love all your videos and your children are absolutely STUNNING! im wearing one of your styles to school tomorrow and im so excited for all the conpliments I will receive! thank you!(:

  67. I also have 5 other siblings including me 6 its going to be a great excperience raising your children in a big happy family!!!!!

    Thanks for your videos

  68. I just knew you were from Utah when I was watching your YouTube videos! I have never seen girls with such intricately combed hair (on a daily basis) in my life! When I had my set of twin girls, I used to doll them all up, but be so jealous that every other mom knew how to do hair. It’s beautiful families like yours that inspire the rest of the world.

    The cool thing about Utah? Everyone’s nice, and willing to share hair secrets. Thanks for all the beautiful hair ideas. :)

  69. Me encnata tu canal y he puesto en practica muchos estilos de peinado en mi niña… y ahora que leo tu historia y es una historia hermosa!!!
    Los admiro mucho mas Dios los bendice!!!

  70. Im from Mexico and I was reading your story….so beautiful…apart let me tell you that you have a lovely family….Blessings!

  71. The babies of this world need more loving families like yours.
    I was also adopted (through LDS Family Services). My Mom had similar isseus with the precursor to the modern IUD. She and my Dad got pregnant shortly after their marriage and graduation from BYU. After my brother was born, that was the birth control method they used. Massive scar tissue formed and after many surgeries and fertility treatments, she was found to be unable to get pregnant again herself.
    I was pre-destined to be a member of this family. I am thiers in every way. Our personalities are the same. Our talents, humor, strengths, and values are the same.
    Words cannot express the gratitude in my heart for the woman who carried me and nourished me during my gestational period. She sacrificed so much to give me the life I was meant to have.
    I’m sure that your beautiful family will feel the same when they are older too.
    As a mother of 4 I have new appreciation af the sacrifices that were made so that I could have my true Eternal Family.
    Thank you so much for sharing your story and your talents/ideas with all of us.

  72. Hi dear!
    It is very difficault to explain my feeling,but I just like to tell you I love your story and your feeling and your husband’ssupport as well.I do belive in our heavenly Father since a miracle happend to me!!I really don’t know how I find your website and read your story !But what I know is I am in a very difficault situation and your story gives me another hope :) I really appreciate your attitude and I wish I can pass my obstacles with faith asap
    Thank you very much

  73. Your adoption story is beautiful. When I read it I was deeply touched and inspired. I too have been deeling with secondary infertility after having the Mirena removed 6 months ago. Our other 3 children were conceived within a month of trying. They were all c-section babies. If I had Known that this could happen from the Mirena I would not have had it. Did the doctors ever determine what was the cause of your infertility exactly? Any information you may have regarding this would be a tremendous help. We would like to add to our family but I am worried that I may never be able to conceive again. Thank you for your wonderful website. It has helped me connect with my daughter even more as I share these fun hairstyles with her.

  74. What an amazing story!

    My daughter begged me to look up new hair styles to do on her hair, as she is getting really bored with the ones I have mastered. Thanks to google your blog was the first one that popped up so we clicked on it.

    As a Mommy of both a biological child and adopted child, I decided to read your adoption story. I stepped away for a second and out of no where my husband and I begin to hear our five year old little girl sing…”Rise, all loyal Cougars…” Nothing out of the ordinary for our household so I didn’t thing too much of it. I come back to the comptuer and my five year old says — “Mommy, they’re Cougars, and they’ve adopted! They’re just like us!”.

    Thanks for sharing your adoption story! I can relate on so many levels. Also, thanks for being Cougars and for the cute hair ideas! It made my little girls night.

  75. I just have to mention, and maybe you have already come to this conclusion, but it seems to me that the Lord planted the little seed of adoption in you when you were young… a prompting. It is interesting how many times throughout your brief explanation how many times you seem to “randomly” think about adoption. The Lord has prepared you for this moment, and it seems to me that He needed you to take in a child from another mother, but since you were happy with the children you were capable of having, He made His will possible. :) That is how it seems to me from the outside. YOu have a touching story, and I have felt the Spirit many times throughout reading. I too have struggled with getting pregnant, and my faith in Heavenly Father was tested completely, but I came out faithful and closer to Him

    PS. I knew you were LDS. Sometimes you can just tell. Now I have proof. :) Keep up the good work, you are a great inspiration for all.

  76. I happened to come across this while searching for hair styles for my 8 year old since the new school year is just a few weeks away. So I was drawn to your site instantly and now I know why. . . My daughter is from my previous marriage. My current husband and I have been married for 5 years and trying to concieve since then, only to find out that my husband doesn’t produce sperm. We have thought of adoption but never really put to much emotion into it. . . Mainly because I was scared of the process. Well I just wanted to thank you for such an ispiring story! You have given me and my family HOPE!

  77. I too had the “Not done” feeling after our twins (#3 & 4 in our family). People looked at me like I was crazy when I said we were having #5. We did not have any problems getting pregnant again after the IUD. But if we had, I think I would have done just about anything to get that baby here. I agree, when you know, you just know. I’m so thankful for the whisperings of the spirit that helped confirm to my husband what I already knew.
    Thank you for sharing your story!!!
    Baby #5 is a month old now and I can’t imagine our family being complete with out her!

  78. Hey Mindy! I read your whole adoption experience start to finish! Wow, what a journey. It totally made me teary! What a special experience. You guys are such great examples. I sometimes forget the importance of trusting in our Heavenly Father. He has a plan for each of us, and if we listen to the promptings of the spirit (as you did) we will be blessed immensely. I loved the sealing pictures! That must have been such an amazing day. Thanks so much for sharing your story! You are an amazing woman!!!! I look up to you so much!

  79. Dear Mindy,

    I’ve been following your blog for a little while but never posted a comment. Thank you for sharing your experience.

    I am 23 years old and not married, but I’ve always known since I was 14 that I wanted to adopt a child one day. There are so many children out there who needs/wants a place to call home and I would love to give a child that opportunity.

    Although not planning to get married for years to come, my boyfriend knows and supports my desire for adoption (in my country, having your own children is more supported than adopting. People only adopt when they can’t have children of their own). I hope and pray that when the time comes, I will have the strength that you and your family has.

    Thank you once again for sharing your story. God Bless…

  80. I’m so glad my husband wasn’t home when I was reading your story because I kept crying! Thank you so much for sharing some of your real life with us. I love the hairstyles, but getting to know the person behind the hair makes it even more fun. Give all of your kids a hug from me.

  81. I read the whole story in one sitting while my little ones were taking a nap! Absolutly beautiful story! So inspiring. Thank YOu for sharing your heart and being so “raw” with all your emotions and openness!

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About Me

What do you get when you cross 34 yrs of living, 14 yrs of marriage, one HOT husband, five adorable daughters, one handsome son, and tons of great family and friends? Pretty much the sum total of who I am!!



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