Spoiling Your Children | Mom Minute

March 01, 2014

Today’s Mom Minute topic is about spoiled children. We’ve all known some, have spoiled our own, or perhaps even been one.

Spoiled Children | Mom Minute

There is a definitely a huge difference between providing for a child’s needs versus their wants. Trying to satisfy the former is what we are supposed to do. Providing food, shelter, education, physical care, and love, etc, are why we have this very important role as parents. Providing for a child’s every wants can be very detrimental to them. I often think of little Veruca Salt from the Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory movie as she whined, “Daddy, I want an Oompa Loompa now!

Kate, a viewer, asks this question, “How can you buy clothes and toys for your kids without spoiling them?

Spoiled Children

Although we are not perfect in our home, we have tried to teach our children the value of responsible hard work from a very young age {examples were provided in last week’s post}.

If you were to ask our children what the response is to asking for toys/electronics/clothes, etc, they can recite the refrain, “Is this a want or a need?” From there, our kids categorize the item into one of the two buckets on their own. If the item is not life sustaining, it goes into the want bucket.

If our children want the desired item bad enough, they will have to earn it. We find that they appreciate the item much more, taking very good care of it, if they contribute with their own money or with sweat equity.

The CGH kids have contributed to the purchases of clothes, extra curricular activities, birthday gifts for friends, field trips, etc, since they began kindergarten. They do not know  differently, and understand that nothing in life comes free.

In just the few hours since the video went live on The Mom’s View YouTube channel this morning, we’ve had a few viewers claim that they feel that we very much spoil our children.

I personally do not feel that we do, feeling more that we go to great lengths to prevent it, but I guess that really depends on where you are standing.

We need to be careful as a society not to judge someone having a few nice things as being spoiled. It isn’t so much about what they have… but how they speak to, interact with, and treat others. Being a contribution to society very much involves accepting responsibility, respecting and helping others, and valuing hard work.

To see more about how to avoid spoiling children, and how to value hard work, please feel free to view the #MomMinute episode below…

What suggestions do you have on the subject?

Please free to leave your comments below…

Happy Parenting!

Comment on this post »

Hard Work and the Value of a Dollar | Mom Minute

February 22, 2014

For my husband and I, both of our families taught us the value of hard work at a young age. It is something we felt was important enough to do the same with our own kids.

Value of a Dollar and Hard Work

Farrah, a fan on YouTube asked, “When should your child get a first job? How can you push them in a positive way?”

First Job

Obviously, we do not have legally-employable teenagers yet, but I do have advice for what I plan to do. This does not mean that I have not been preparing my children from a very young age to appreciate hard work and the value of a dollar.

In fact, just this week I had a parent ask me about how we teach our kids to work.

I went into detail about how we placed our children on salary {allowance} for “additional” household chores when they turned age 5. Keeping rooms clean and regular household chores are simply part of living in the home. Then, for each birthday present I had to buy, field trip or piano lesson I had to pay for, etc, the child had to contribute $0.25 towards it. Very quickly our children started to see that things have a cost, and that money is not plentiful.

{My husband then began a rule that he would charge the kids another $0.25 for lights being left on or outside doors being left open. You wouldn’t believe how helpful this was when it came time that they wanted something, and then did not have enough money to buy it!}

These efforts helped to teach our kids how to not only work for a salary, like in real life, but how to budget and understand the value of a dollar. We even held annual performance evaluations, and offered raises, or bonuses, if results met expectations… just like in real life.

While nobody is perfect in ensuring children learn these valuable lessons, it is important as parents that we do all we can to teach them in a simple and relatable manner while they are young, so each is better prepared for life’s lessons as he/she ventures out in to the world.

To see more about how we teach our children the value of a dollar and hard work in the CGH home, please feel free to view the #MomMinute episode below…

What suggestions do you have the subject, and at what age did you have your first job?

Please free to leave your comments below…

Happy Parenting!

Comment on this post »

Girls and Makeup, at What Age is it Appropriate?

February 15, 2014

Many of you know that we’ve been asked the mascara question regarding my daughters’ eyelashes a million times since we started this hairstyle website back in 2008.  {Viewers often thought that I used mascara on my young daughters.} As you have come to know me and my family, you can see that those are my girls’ 100%natural eyelashes.

This does bring up an excellent question, however… “At what age is makeup appropriate for our daughters?”

Girls and Makeup | At What Age is it Appropriate?

The answer may vary, depending on the parents and also the child. There really isn’t a right answer, although we can all agree that lots of makeup on girls at a young age isn’t the norm. {Dance recitals, and other events of the like, excluded.}

In our home, my girls have always loved lip gloss and Santa usually provided some each year in their Christmas stockings. By age 12, we allowed Brooklyn and Bailey to wear a little mascara to help accentuate their eyes. By age 13, we allowed them to use a limited amount of concealer or powder to help hide acne.

Today, at age 14, my girls can wear pretty much what they want, and I am happy that they have decided that less is more!

My mantra with the girls is, “Makeup should only be used to accent your natural beauty, not cover it up.”

If you are looking for a little extra help, many makeup stores and counters will have cosmetologists who are more than happy to give you and your daughter a beginner makeup training. {Also, my twins are posting a video series on their YouTube channel, BrooklynAndBailey, where they teach beginner makeup tips.}

To see more about our position on makeup in the CHG home, please click the #MomMinute episode below…

What suggestions do you have on age appropriate makeup for girls? At what age did you start, and with what?

Please free to leave your comments below…

Happy Parenting!

Comment on this post »

Dealing with Heartbreak | Mom Minute

February 08, 2014

It has been 20 years now, but I can still remember how I felt after my first heartbreak in high school. It seemed like he was my world, and I really felt like we would likely end up getting married.

First Heartbreak | Mom Minute

When we broke up, it was difficult for me and there was lots of crying on my part. I did have ways of dealing with the heartbreak, and chocolate was certainly part of the solution! It offered “replacement endorphins”, which seemed to help. I also immersed myself into exercise, as it not only allowed me to work out the frustrations, but it also helped me feel better physically.

The topic of this video is actually in response to a young fan, and the advice I offer is what I tell my teenage daughters.

To hear my recommendations on how to deal with your first breakup, feel free to watch the The Mom’s View Mom Minute episode below…

What suggestions do you have on how to cope with heartbreak? Please free to leave your comments below…

Happy Loving!

Comment on this post »

Eating Disorders | Mom Minute

February 01, 2014

In today’s episode of Mom Minute, we invited Kati Morton, a licensed marriage and family therapist to talk about a very serious issue today… Eating Disorders.

Eating Disorders

I am not a licensed therapist, nor would I ever offer advice in any professional manner on the subject. What I will share is what I do to help keep my kids aware of the dangers of eating disorders and if I ever suspect that anything is going on, the first thing I should do is seek professional help.

The media today surrounds us with images of men and women in an idealized state. Often the media will take an otherwise beautiful model, add tons of makeup/powders/gels/hairsprays, turn on unnatural lighting, add a fake breeze, pose them in uncomfortable poses wearing uncomfortable clothes {or lack thereof}… and that is what the general public takes as an acceptable standard for society. If that wasn’t enough, 99.9% of the photos are then photoshopped to remove wrinkles, moles, shadows, skin blemishes, or even add to or reduce natural curves.

Women and young teens are particularly susceptible to desiring the perfect image of their gender, and fooling themselves into believing that anything less is unacceptable. One way they believe they can control their body shape is to alter their eating habits or dieting.

{Men are not immune to eating disorders, but they only make up only 10-15% of the cases. This statistic is something that scares me as a mother of six, with five of them being girls.}

To hear Kati’s recommendations of how to talk about this as a friend, or as a parent to a child suffering from an eating disorder {along with the warning signs}, please be sure to watch the The Mom’s View Mom Minute episode below…

Do you have any experiences on this topic, or any advice for others who either are going through an eating disorder or know someone who is? Please free to leave your comments below…

Happy Parenting!

Comment on this post »